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Sunday, November 10, 2013

The Book of Ruth: Finding #Love the Biblical Way {Getting Boaz attention Part IV~How to gain confidence}

Previous Post:”Part 2~Approach with confidence

I am a romantic at heart. No, I am not a romance novelist. However, every book that I have written has a romantic element. I am a fan of love. I love seeing happy couples together and cringe when I see unhappy couples tolerating one another—I see that a lot. When I read the book of Ruth, I was fascinated. They actually dated in biblical times. Who knew? Seriously, I read it and I want to share what I learned. I don’t know how long this series will last, but I will keep going until it is done.

Here I am telling you to walk, talk and move confidently—but the center of the problem may be that you have zero confidence. I once lacked confidence. I guess on some levels I still do. However, I treat it like a lifelong disease (for lack of a better term). I fight it every day. And to be honest, I need to spend a separate blog series on confidence, but this should help.

First, we should define confidence. Having confidence is believing in yourself—for the “nonbeliever.” But for the “believer,” it is belief in yourself and belief that no matter what; the One above all, has your back. Ruth had that authentic confidence.  That is why she followed Naomi. She truly believed that she and Naomi would survive and that Ruth’s God would help them when they could not help themselves. Bad things will happen, but you have to believe that God is in the numbers.

Now, I said that I work on my confidence daily. I do not mean to suggest that I sit around and ponder why is it that I look down upon myself. No, I actually do things that bring me confidence or make me feel confident. I think that this depends on the individual, but we are all connected on some level.

I like to wear new clothes when I am not filling confident about a situation. It cost money, but I don’t mind going to a consignment shop or just making the effort to make my old clothes look new. {Dry cleaners, washing and iron, etc.} I put a lot of emphasis on the inside of a person. But there is something to manipulating the outside, to massage what is inside. It is like tinting the windows of the car, so the inside will be a little cooler in the summer. It may not help as much as the air conditioner. But the combination of the two will keep the car very cool.

So, I play dress up. But I exercise too. Now, I am no underwear model. I would think that the average person, who sees me, would argue that I look like a BIG couch potato. But that is not nearly as important as the fact that I know that this couch potato can run two miles, and doesn’t have high blood pressure. Granted, I do eat poorly most of the time, but I put forth the effort to eat better. Moreover, when I am successful, my confidence soars.   

Things that you are good at or can improve upon will work wonders for your confidence. Even if you are just a fast reader, read a book in a day just to show yourself how great you are. Try to read it faster next time to emphasize to yourself just how great you are. Go find an old school arcade game and beat the high score, let everyone else see how great you are. And you are great. You may not know it, but you are great at something. Let that greatness translate into the rest of your life.

Success itself is a great confidence builder. But don’t misunderstand. I think that what you do will build confidence. However, you should not base your confidence on what you do, but on what you know. You have to know that you are charming, intelligent, a great catch and above all, you got God helping you every step of the way. 

If you look at Boaz, he noticed Ruth’s confidence. She was willing to work in a field that didn’t belong to her. He noticed the beauty/sexiness that came with the confidence when she was willing to appear at his feet. And he noticed the Godly dedication to Naomi. Boaz will notice these things in you, but you have to be willing to put those things forward in the first place.

Next Post: I think I got his/her attention…now what?

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